Jack : hey jack, waste my time

hey jack,

what does the name 'jack' actually come from? what does it mean?

- nominally investigative garden association
well niga *cough*,

I looked up the name 'jack' and it actually means, "totally awesome in bed".

ladies, if you're reading, call me. all this pure uncompromising smoothness can be yours if you decide to take me to dinner and pay for the joint cab ride back to your place.

jokes aside, i did head down to my local library and put spend an hour or so burning the books. amidst the smouldering pages and screams of human torment i found a "origin of names" book that says that 'jack' derives from the old middle english 'jaourquek'. 'jaour' meaning absolutely, all-encompassing or totally. and 'quek' from the root 'quekare' meaning 'awesome in bed'.

i couldn't read the rest of the book because someone had ripped it apart and fashioned it into an ad-hoc tourniquet to tend to the wounded. i decided to untie my red bathrobe and retire to my quarters for an early afternoon round of martinis.

Comments:

Blogger andrew 6:26 pm, May 08, 2006  
i was quite annoyed to learn that jack doesnt even have a meaning.
You only have a weak ass version of the name john. or perhaps jaques or jacob

not like my awesome name which means strong, manly, valiant, courageous, etc you get the idea
Blogger Jack 7:08 pm, May 08, 2006  
actually i think andrew means, "courageously sunburns before everyone else on the beach"
Blogger andrew 10:31 pm, May 08, 2006  
i cant help it, my scottish blood traded in sun protection for a beserker fighting ability sometime during the middle ages.

Sadly i think the berserker trait was later traded to some nordic lads for a pint at the pub

in short i wish i was either nordic or a scottish berserker (im used to putting on five layers of sunscreen now, i dont think id ever go back...unless i was some sort of negro jungle warrior..or a zulu they were cool, and they only need to put sunscreen on the soles of their feet)
Blogger AkaiChou 1:41 pm, May 09, 2006  
and their palms! don't forget your palms!!
Anonymous daniel 5:05 pm, May 11, 2006  
how're u sposed to apply sunscreen and not get it on ur palms?
Blogger AkaiChou 10:29 pm, May 11, 2006  
.......spray on??
Blogger andrew 11:40 am, May 12, 2006  
or you could jump into a vat of it with your hands above your head?

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